During April’s Support Circle, attending clients focused on “forgiveness.” Some of our clients proposed this topic because this is a common theme with which they struggle, even those who are in the post-divorce stages. Often times, it is assumed that forgiveness means that you are trying to reconcile or condone your spouse’s behavior. But in actuality, it is something you are doing for yourself. Forgiving someone allows you to take a more positive path forward, while unloading the negative feelings associated with the divorce process. It can help heal those emotional wounds.
How Do You Learn to Forgive Post-Divorce?
Clients were curious to learn how to forgive themselves for choosing the partner that they did, not getting out of the marriage sooner, not doing enough to save the marriage and finding themselves in a stage they did not expect. Clients engaged in a forgiveness mindset exercise. They wrote down their guilty thoughts, and then challenged them by using “cognitive reframing” to change their outlook on those thoughts.
Finding Inspiration and Post-Divorce Affirmations
Clients also reviewed some positive affirmations (including Mahatma Gandhi’s “The weak cannot forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong” and “I never knew how strong I was until I had to forgive someone who wasn’t sorry, and accept an apology I never received”. The quotes really helped clients to normalize their experiences.
Our clients were also given this blog article as a resource. It’s an excellent link for those who want to read more on this topic:
https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-forgive-yourself-after-divorce/
Join Us for Post Divorce Healing
CGG’s Divorce Support Circle is held the second Tuesday of every month and is facilitated by our psychologist/divorce coach Dr. Leah Nathan.
