Divorcing your spouse can be intimidating, but when there are children involved, it can seem even more complicated. With so much misinformation surrounding child custody, it’s easy for parents to feel confused and overwhelmed. In this blog, we will explore some common myths surrounding child custody and support, so that you can make informed decisions in the best interests of your children during the divorce process in Virginia.
Myth 1: The Mother Always Wins.
One of the biggest myths surrounding child custody battles is that the mother will always win custody. In the past, it was customary for Virginia judges to award the mother custody, particularly if the child was young. This was known as the “tender years doctrine.” This doctrine is no longer recognized in Virginia, such that a judge is forbidden to favor the mother over the father in a custody case based solely on her gender. Instead, the court focuses on the best interests of the child.
It’s important to remember there are two kinds of custody: (1) legal custody, which is the right and responsibility of a parent or guardian to make major decisions about a child’s life; and (2) physical custody, which is where the child lives and who is responsible for their daily care and supervision. Nowadays, joint legal and physical custody is the norm.
Myth 2: If I Have More Custody, I Don’t Have to Pay Child Support.
Not necessarily. In Virginia, the amount of child support that a non-custodial parent pays is based on a sliding scale that considers the incomes of both parents and how many days the child spends with them. If you have custody of your child for 90 days or less per year, the Virginia Sole Custody Child Support Guideline is used to calculate the amount of child support. This guideline is utilized whether the parent has 89 days of visitation or only one.
If you have custody of your child more than 90 days per year, the Virginia Shared Custody Support Guideline is used to calculate the amount of child support. Generally, child support decreases as parenting time increases over 90 days. To “count” as a day, the parenting time must be at least 24 hours. An overnight visit (such as from Wednesday evening to Thursday morning) is counted as one-half of a day.
Myth 3: Child Support Must End at 18.
Not necessarily. Child support will continue to be paid if the child is a full-time high school student, not self-supporting, and living in the home of the party receiving support. In this case, child support continues until age 19, or until the child graduates, whichever comes first.
The court may also order that support be paid or continue to be paid for any child over the age of 18 who is severely and permanently mentally or physically disabled, and the disability existed before the child turned 18 (or 19 if the child was still being supported while a full-time high school student as described above), unable to live independently and support himself, and residing in the home of the parent seeking or receiving support.
Additionally, child support arrears, or “back child support” can be collected even after a child turns 18.
Myth 4: Custody and Support Arrangements are Permanent.
Virginia law permits both child custody and child support to be modified if there is a material change in circumstances.
A material change in circumstances for child support might be a substantial change in income, a job layoff or reduction of hours, or an increase in childcare costs.
Changes in custody can only be ordered if there has been a material change in circumstances affecting custody, and that the modified arrangement is in the child’s best interests. Examples could be relocation or of a parent, or a change in the child’s needs. A child’s opinion may also be considered if they are of a sufficient age and maturity level to express a reasonable preference.
Myth 5: Custody Cases Always Go to Court.
It is far more likely that you and your partner will resolve custody issues before having to go to court, through alternative dispute resolutions such as mediation or collaborative law. The divorce process in Virginia can be lengthy, however, these resolutions offer a different option. These methods are more cost effective, less adversarial, and allow for more creativity and input in the final resolution.
Divorce Process in Virginia
If you are considering filing for divorce and have children, contact the attorneys at Cooper Ginsberg Gray for help.